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The Woman

Toby hates Derby County FC and loves Tomatos because they are red. He has poor posture and a hate of Hattrick. His spare time is spent making a Welsh translation of hattrick. Toby doesn't speak Welsh, but his efforts to help, show what a dedicated and warm person he is. Toby speaks fluent German but refuses to use it on account that he doesn't want to. "Why would I want to speak an ancient dead language?" He says.

Toby's team, the Belcher Harriers were due to be English champions in 2009. However, due to his limited access to the interweb (Belper library has unfortunately not taken advantage of the new 24 hour licensing law), this plan has been postponed until 2021.

The Legend

Toby once gave Derby County, Norwich City and Barnsley legend Ashley Ward a Big Mac.


Toby is a key member of the 5th Slot Fed. He took a lead role in the "Time of Strife" and has since gone on to be the most amazing member/persistant spammer that the fed has ever produced.

Proudest HT Moment

Toby's most amazing moment in Hattrick came with a 2-1 victory over some Croatian team managed by Catalyst2950. The Croatian losers, claimed the match was only a friendly, for training purposes, but we all know the truth.

Quotes by Toby14483

" PIE ist nicht gut"

"Vin Diesel is awesome!" (inspired by moon110)

"I love The King of Sand Dunes very much"

"Today the train I was on hit someone."

"I'm englands most sexy hattricker. I had 66% of the vote. That was a tough day, I tell you."

"George Best is dead and Maradona is still alive. 'Tis a sad day."

"Stop collecting flags you gits!"

"A strawberry is not a berry, but a banana is!"