Thought Police's Unfortunate Victory

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International titles
Preceded by
FC DeRibas
Season 55
Hattrick Masters
Season 56
Succeeded by
Season 57

Thought Police's Unfortunate Victory was a English team managed by malk77. It was founded on 17-04-2008.

The team won the Hattrick Masters XXIX.

The team won the English Cup in seasons 55.

Prize shelf

Division VII.PNG VII.460 Division VI.PNG VI.875 Division VI.PNG VI.875 Division V.PNG V.106 Division IV.PNG IV.30 Division III.PNG III.16 Division II.PNG II.1 Division II.PNG II.4 Cupseason56.png Cupwinner HT Masters.PNG HM Winner Division VI.PNG VI.623


Before HM Final

The Other Cup Final Interview

by malk77 (07/07/2014 14:28)

Last season's Prem runner up. Malk77 is in the hot seat as well this week...

Your team, Thought Police's Unfortunate Victory is facing The Red Flag flies at dawn... in the Cup Final (R13) on Tuesday. You made R11 in s47, and have been in R8 (or further) every season for the last 11 seasons. That's quite a track record, do you think that this could finally be your year?

From a quick scout I'd say RED is the favourite but perhaps that's just classic nervous pessimism. I'm massively excited and nervous about this as I've always gone after the cup, never giving up and going for training instead and rarely PICing or putting in B team players where I couldn't clearly get away with it. It should be a good close game, we're both in pretty good shape and have a couple of tweaks that could appear in the lineup. Cue an early keeper injury or IM red card to ruin that!

If you have a favourite tune of 2014, please provide a link to vimeo/utube/soundcloud for us to listen, but an old timer's classic tune would be just as good?

I don't listen to music on the radio so tend to discover things a bit later than they come out unless it's a new album from someone I know well already. So I'll pop in three links if that's ok.

First is iamamiwhoami's second project, kin. The whole thing should be listened to as a whole (available free from the youtube channel) but I particularly like this track and video. (

Second is probably my favourite track by who I probably listen to most at the moment and who might be making the most interesting music to me right now. No qualifiers there at all! Grimes, weregild. (

Finally, partially as she has an album on its way this year, mostly because she's fantastic. Sóley, Smashed Birds. (

You took over your team on 18/04/08, taking 8 seasons to get promoted to IV, and 8 more to get to the Premiership where you were runner up last season, which went to the wire. That's a record many managers would envy, so what is the secret to the speed of your rise through the hattrick pyramid?

I think the main thing was a willingness to research how the game worked, talk to experienced managers, read up on some of the studies etc. Then was not being married to a training for profit, build a prime age team and sell up early philosophy that seemed to be prevalent when I started. This has been replaced a little now by a home grown strategy that I suspect will cause a lot of managers to limit their teams. Not that there was anything wrong with either but sticking to rigidly to anything won't help.

I was also willing to put quite a lot of time into the game. Starting off with looking for the right players to skill trade when I was a passing trainer and then migrating into scouting oppositions properly. Scouting isn't as important as finding the rich niches in the game though. For me it was working out that a high stamina, old player game could be effective, particularly in the top division.

If a fan wanted to buy you a pint, which pub would it be easiest to find you in, and what's your poison?

The pub is easy, the best one in London ( As for the pint, you'd have to check their blog to see what's on! Camden Pale Ale is a good shout as a session beer though.

This season, Benno was voted in to be the England U20 coach. After 10 games he's 2nd in group 11 on 21pts a point behind Montenegro and a point ahead of Vietnam. You've already spent two seasons as the England NT manager, do you still follow the Friday night National game action, and what do you make of all the recent front page attention to our U20 England set-up.

Bar for the last game he's made a good fist of it, not as good as I would have done mind but good enough (insert emoticon of choice). I've followed without having done anything bar than bag the next u20 keeper for a bargain price through sheer luck. He's doing better than Darth's miserable Q2 for the full national side though so long may that continue.

What skill are you training at the moment and what stamina percentage are you currently using and why?

I've been training goal keepers for a while now, first a Nippon former u20 defender up to their NT keeper and then I picked up Stuart Nathan when he was listed to keep him in contention and ended up with him being first choice for a while. Mostly keeper training with some SP thrown in and always at high stamina, 40% currently but even that isn't high enough. I don't think many realise the importance of stamina and exchange a lot of performance for a tiny bonus to training.

You currently pay for platinum supporter, with a second team in (7052) here in England, a league you share with 6 bots and a Belgian manager's platinum 2nd team. Will the Liars be fast-tracked to the Prem just as quickly as TPUV, or will you be dropping platinum at the next renewal date because of the price increases?

I've got a lot of supporter left before I have to make that decision (about 18 months) and plenty could change in that time. Currently I have a couple of top GK prospects (both English) that I'll be concentrating on but at some point there'll be a war chest to have a crack at the league structure. The training isn't optimal for it and that comes first for that team but I'm sure I'll work something out.

What is the worst thing about censorship?

(Ed. we had to censor the answer to this one)

Please tell us how/where you met your other half (or last conquest), and how he/she feels about your hattrick addiction?

At school is when we met but we got together at university. Coming up to 9 years together now and married for 18 months. She's a saint and putting up with my hattrick addiction pales with me being broken semi-constantly by rugby.

1According to your head to head stats, you've played your cup final opposition 4 times over the last 18 months, all in Premiership fixtures. The first of these meetings was a nil nil draw, and the other 3 were won by the side with home advantage. Neither side has home advantage on Tuesday. It looks pretty even on paper, so will you be setting a conditional sub if it is a draw after 119 minutes to bring on a keeper who will dive the correct way for each of the opposition penalties (as Tim Krul did on Saturday for Holland in the WC quarter-final).

Hopefully I'll even up the head to head on Tuesday. There won't be any keeper shenanigans but I think RED will pull out a cheeky CA so I'll be set up to counter that.

What was your favourite movie of 2013/14?

I'm not a big film watcher any more, I don't recall the last one that really wowed me. I'm in the middle of reading China Miéville's novels though and have found them all fantastic. Embassytown and the Bas-Lag trilogy so far, great stuff. (

With the World Cup semi-final (Brazil vs. Germany) on Tuesday being broadcast at the same time as your cup final, what will you be watching, and who do you think will win the world cup and why?

Neither I'm afraid, I'll be running hill sprints (with some dry retching thrown in for good measure) on Parliament Hill as part of pre season training.

As for winning the World Cup, Ireland will shock the world next year!

After HM Final

Masters winner interviewed

by malk77 (06/11/2014 14:23)

After beating Red in the Final, if anyone had suggested that you'd emulate Bud to become England's second Master's Champion this season.

What would you have said?

I didn't even expect to win that game, Red was the favourite as I was having a bit of a 'mare' with form and injuries. Even with the general spec advantage and also with indirects Red's overall ratings put him as a 65% favourite, so a little bit of luck kicked everything off.

My first thought about the Masters was how TS would affect my Premier League campaign but then I was a little unlucky to lose my qualifier so it didn't matter so much. I had a quick look through previous Masters games to remind myself of the standard and whether it was worth a splurge to see how far I could get. I didn't think it was worth it with the cash I had!

So, anyone suggesting I would go all the way wouldn't have received a serious response!

Can we discuss your tournament preparation? You'd bought no players in the lead up to your opening game, PIC'd away in the Cup but then PIN'd away in the league prior to your opening fixture (497040718). Your opponent from Barbados opted for a 4-5-1 press using just one wing attack and a half-decent defence, but they let you have 73% to 76% of the ball. Did you consider a PIC for this game to help boost TS?

No prep other than checking out the opposition and realising I'd got a kind draw in the first round. As mentioned above I didn't think it was worth getting in new players , especially not for that game. The league was more of a priority then, hence the PIN plus the TS boost wasn't required at that stage and I could get back to max TS just with the cup game for the second masters round.

After a chance for a PIC in the English cup, your second game was against the Icelandic champions (497212981). Did you expect them to CA quite so effectively with 3 CA chances converted as well as scoring a quick SE?

I'd expected to go up against a good defence and CA rating in this game but they were poorly spec optimised and that's killer for a CA side. Their converting all three CA chances wasn't in the plan, nor was my quick+pass SE falling to a player without scoring and then them bagging the same event later on. Certainly scoring 5 against that defence could be considered fortunate but the overall result was about right.

You then opted to PIC at home in the league, and to MoTs the Argentine team you'd drawn for game 3 (497320890) (readers should note that a MoTs or PIC order in the Masters has a relatively dampened effect on TS compared to that experienced in regular games). They edged the hatstats, but the decision to MoTs looks to have paid off as you edged possession with a midfield approx 2.5 levels higher than the opposition manager would have expected. Please tell us about your thought process leading to this crucial decision to MoTs?

The home PIC was against a relatively obvious CA which helped. From there I worked through the numbers and thought a Masters MOTS plus cup PIC would leave me in ok shape for the following league game so I decided to roll the dice. As I was against a side with good specs, I really thought I needed the midfield boost to progress. The match itself was another rollercoaster. A non tactical CA for them, another missed quick+pass to my converted winger up top without much scoring, them getting the head event and my lot failing to capitalise on a mistake from an unpredictable IM. Given the special event shenanigans I was gratified to have gone for the MOTS which secured the normal chances I needed to win a 50-50 ish game.

In Game 4, you'd been matched up with the Estonian champions (497361272) and had recouped some TS with a PIC in the English cup beforehand. They matched you in midfield but had 482 hatstats to your 436 indicating better attack and defence ratings. Do you think that their decision to AOW could actually have cost them the win, or was it the right tactic for them, and they were just unlucky?

The AOW was a bad decision and one I wasn't expecting. I believe I had a spec advantage which just led me to not MOTS this one. A TI trick wasn't an option and I put the league first and decided to hope my 35% or so chance of victory would come off. Still, they should have known I was a wing back down (either form or just because I needed the extra DF for midfield) so would have a wing relatively open. They could have left out the AOW and played their IMTWs normal for an even better chance at the win. An odd decision by them, for me.

For game 5, you drew Ukrainian side FC DeRibas (497445991) who were on for a hattrick of Masters titles. Did you seriously, at any moment think you could actually beat them? You PIN'd in the league suggesting you may have resigned yourself to defeat, and in the end they pulled 518 hatstats to your 428 with 57%+ of the ball, and they would probably win a game like that 9 out of 10 times.

Yup, I was definitely thinking that I was out. I could probably have MOTS'd but I just didn't see any point! Still, hard as it is to criticise a team going for a hat trick of Masters titles, they were also poorly spec optimised and why did he leave his right defence open? Moving his centre back to the opposite side would've played the odds. I'd gone asymmetric because I was a massive underdog, he didn't need to.

Still, a definite 1 in 10, to 3 in 20 game for me and another SE going to my poor winger playing up top who spuffed it yet again! Two other goals in the match made up for it mind!

We've heard on the grapevine that you went on a bit of a bender after that win, with some folk even suggesting that you were so hung over you actually forgot to set orders for the English cup, sending out a default PIC team, losing and getting a key full-back injured. Notwithstanding, you had drawn the Chinese champions for game 6, the quarter-final (497498379) who pulled 519 hatstats to your 425 and they had 52% of the ball. Seriously, most of us would be happy to get one lucky win like this in a season, let alone two on the spin in the Masters, even if your IM got injured on 34mins?

All true I'm afraid. When I saw the result against Bunfolds I was ultimately narked with myself. Not only had I thrown away my English Cup run but my TC took a battering and made the game against Arcadia an even worse prospect. The only think I can say about the game is that the Hattrick Gods were clearly sending a message to teams that hadn't specced themselves properly! The funny thing is that if they had the right heads and quicks that'd be about the team that I'd hope to build one day. Maybe a smidge more centre attack if money were no object but it's pretty much bang on.

So, having somehow skanked your way into the semi-final, your game 7 opponent was from Liechtenstein. In the interim you'd PIC'd the league (losing at home) bought a replacement full-back, a replacement IM and a TDF. These purchases included a nasty and a controversial, both of whom could have damaged TS on arrival, but you must have decided the investment was worth the risk? In the match (497566586) you MoTs'd, edging possession with 51% but they had 524 hatstats to your 468. 1 win like this looks like luck. 2 on the spin even more so, but getting 3 consecutive results like this, it begins to look very much as though you know something about the match engine that the rest of us don't! So what is it?

The H00ligans league game was a 50/50 given my PIC. I was tempted to PIN and start the TI trick, but I thought I'd have just enough at home with the new players. They were too good though and the IM injury and non tactical CA sealed their win. Again that was less than ideal prep for the Masters as TC still wasn't doing brilliantly.

The personalities of the new players were another calculated risk. The PIC would mitigate the drops a little and I needed the price/quality that they provided. Luckily I was up against another team that lacked head players, so I could buy another ringer IM without having to worry about spec. Sure enough I bagged another head SE in the match. I didn't need quite as much luck in this one, winning midfield helped, spec advantage again, closer in the centre than I had any right to be... A 30% chance is an automatic win for me in the Masters!

The final. Latvian cup winners Trance Masters were the opposition. You pulled the TI trick for this match to raise TS after your MoTs in the semi-final. Incredibly, you had managed to avoid the temptation to use it earlier, and cannily held on to your biggest weapon to help you in the final. How on earth did you manage to resist using it for a previous game? You also bought two more players for the final, a TDF and an IM. A late injury after you'd used your subs put you down to 10 men, just 3-2 ahead with 8 minutes to play. Just how long were those 8 minutes, and did you have any fingernails left by the final whistle? Final Hatstats: 568 to your 494, making it 4 incredible wins to achieve this title, you must be overjoyed?

The TI trick was a given at that stage. As for not using it earlier, it just didn't fall that way. The other MOTS I threw was covered by the cup PIC, I guess I could have gone MOTS against Kollane but that was a bit early for me to see it as worthwhile whilst still in the other competitions. The same went for Arcadia as I still didn't really think I could win it at all, and being out of the cup meant TS was hard to come by. Oh, and I just didn't see any chance of winning against FC DeRibas at all!

For the game I mortgaged loads of players with the help of some kindly early bids to bring in the mega ringer TDF and other IM. The 6 heads didn't get me the SE though and at that point I really thought the dream was over. But, I'd got my attack sectors high enough that every one had a chance and sure enough I got an equaliser to keep my poor heart in it. Soon, they re-took the lead and I thought they'd go on to win at a canter but once again I got back into it and managed to go into the half level on goals and midfield. By this point I was on the bus home and checking my phone for updates. Classically, I was thinking "don't check, don't jinx it" even though I purport not to be superstitious! The goal to go up and then holding on with 10 men (always a risk when your team is so old you need to make stamina subs) had my heart rate, sat down on a bus, over my maximum threshold. Absolute madness. Overjoyed doesn't begin to capture how it felt. Grinning ear to ear for days, absolutely indescribable.

I'm just reading back through the thread on HT-England now (16672563.1) brilliant stuff.

The funny thing was I couldn't really bask as I needed to make sure I'd sorted out my transfers to buy Nathan (260436100) back, so as to not screw over the Posti and the NT!

Since winning, you have sold up, and other than having 2 Goalkeepers in training, your team is 'spent'. What next for TPUV?

I didn't really mean to sell up but I needed to ensure I could get Nathan back and it turned out I'd dug a little too deep to buy in the ringers.

I'll have to keep forking out for platinum to keep the second team going whilst I work out what to do with FWDP *cough* TPUV. There might be something cheeky at the end of this season but the sensible thing would be to build a team that can win the English Premier. I should have moved onto proper training but I'll see out Nathan's run in the NT and make a decision then.

Thanks to everyone for the comments in the thread. Honestly, it still hasn't sunk in!