Valdimar Jensson: Difference between revisions

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== Bio ==
== Bio ==
'''Þráinn Fróðason''' was a central defender who played for [[FC Sugar Tits]] and was an original member of the team.
'''Valdimar Jensson''' "played" for [[FC Sugar Tits]] and was an original member of the team.


No one is really sure what Jensson did as a member of the team. He rarely played, logging just 119 minutes on the pitch in the three-plus seasons he was with the club. Some speculated that he was a traveling preacher bootlegging moonshine to the ball boys. One thing is certain: Jensson was an utterly useless player. As already stated, he played 119 minutes in competitive matches, never scored a goal, never made an assist, and never took a shot on goal. It's quite possible that he never touched a soccer ball. Legend says that the area of the bench where he sat was worn so shiny and smooth from Jensson's butt polishing it every week that a man could use it as a mirror while shaving.


Fróðason worked at a car wash in Reyjavik before joining FC Sugar Tits. Technically proficient, we was able to juggle three soccer balls in the air while simultaneously tossing a whaling pike with one hand and eating a slice of pepperoni pizza with the other. Unfortunately, his burly build and defensive instincts usually meant he played in the defensive backline, where his pike-tossing and ball-juggling skills were of little use. Fróðason was ultimately relegated to the bench when the new wave of youth academy recruits arrived and the club's focus turned toward developing homegrown talent in Season 41.
Fróðason's first appearance in an FC Sugar Tits uniform was during a Cup match in Season 39 at '''The Valley of the Gods''' against [[Ragnaldo]] on May 22, 2013 (2/39).


 
Valdimar Jensson, age 30, was released by the club on Friday May 16 2014 and was last seen drifting aimlessly among the practice fields of his former club. His glory days are clearly over.
Fróðason's first appearance in an FC Sugar Tits uniform was during a friendly match in Season 38 at '''Turino IF Arena''' against [[Turino IF]] on May 8, 2013 (16/38).
 
 
As of May 11, 2014, Fróðason had scored 2 career goals in 3 professional seasons, both while playing with FC Sugar Tits. Þráinn Fróðason is currently 30 years old. Þráinn Fróðason was released by the club on Thursday May 15 2014 and was last seen in the VIP section, looking somewhat bored. His glory days are clearly over.


== Performance History ==
== Performance History ==
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== Transfer History ==
== Transfer History ==
Þráinn Fróðason played his entire career with FC Sugar Tits.
Valdimar Jensson played his entire career with FC Sugar Tits.


== Memorable Moments ==
== Memorable Moments ==
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None. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Ekkert. Nada.
None. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Ekkert. Nada.


{{DEFAULTSORT:Jensson, Valdimar}}
[[category:Icelandic Players]]
[[category:Icelandic Players]]
[[category:FC Sugar Tits Players]]
[[category:FC Sugar Tits Players]]

Latest revision as of 19:50, 30 January 2019

Valdimar Jensson
(379089149)
Personal Information
Full Name Valdimar Jensson
Country Iceland Iceland
Player ID (379089149)
Status Retired
Number 81
TSI 120 (5/15/2014)
Position Midfielder
Specialty Quick
Current Club Retired
Youth Club
No Information


Honors

Bio

Valdimar Jensson "played" for FC Sugar Tits and was an original member of the team.

No one is really sure what Jensson did as a member of the team. He rarely played, logging just 119 minutes on the pitch in the three-plus seasons he was with the club. Some speculated that he was a traveling preacher bootlegging moonshine to the ball boys. One thing is certain: Jensson was an utterly useless player. As already stated, he played 119 minutes in competitive matches, never scored a goal, never made an assist, and never took a shot on goal. It's quite possible that he never touched a soccer ball. Legend says that the area of the bench where he sat was worn so shiny and smooth from Jensson's butt polishing it every week that a man could use it as a mirror while shaving.

Fróðason's first appearance in an FC Sugar Tits uniform was during a Cup match in Season 39 at The Valley of the Gods against Ragnaldo on May 22, 2013 (2/39).

Valdimar Jensson, age 30, was released by the club on Friday May 16 2014 and was last seen drifting aimlessly among the practice fields of his former club. His glory days are clearly over.

Performance History

Note: Performance stats are for competitive matches played with FC Sugar Tits. Friendlies are not included.

Season Apps Minutes Minutes/Match Goals (T) Goals/Match Goals (L) Goals (Q) Goals (C) Hat Tricks Braces Captain Man of the Match GK WB CD WI IM FW
42 0 0 0.00 0 0.00 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
41 0 0 0.00 0 .000 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
40 0 0 0.00 0 .000 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0
39 3 119 39.67 0 .000 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 2 0
Total 3 119 39.67 0 .000 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 0 0 2 0

Hat Tricks

None.

Transfer History

Valdimar Jensson played his entire career with FC Sugar Tits.

Memorable Moments

None. Zero. Zip. Zilch. Ekkert. Nada.