Tight Butthole Republic

Tight Butthole Republic Tournament

The first edition of the trophy, before it was eventually awarded to inaugural winners Spartan Curbstomp F.C.
First Match	05.14.2012
Country	USA
Region	Pennsylvania
Zone	North America
Hosts	Battle Toads FC & LOAF'S LOAFS

The Tight Butthole Republic is an American Tournament originating in Pennsylvania, more specifically in the suburban-Philadelphia area. The tournament is currently in its Sixth Edition as of 1.14.2013. It is internationally known as the toughest, most physical tournament of its kind, as many teams rarely choose to come back for a second try. The first season was marred by an advertising mishap, as Russian airline company Rossiya accidentally wrote the word "Sh**" seven times in their ad appearing on the side of the field. After this the tournament has moved on successfully, only accepting local advertisers.

History

There have been 3 editions of the TBR to date.

• Edition 1 winner: Spartan Curbstomp F.C.
• Edition 2 winner: Greater Poe FC
• Edition 3 winner: Middlesex Athletic
• Edition 4 winner: Uniao de Araras
• Edition 5 winner: Lockport Jetz

Statistics

So far 25 different teams have taken part in the TBR. (Last Updated upon completion Edition 6 Semifinals)

Team	Appearances in TBR	Total Points (not including knockout)	Total Wins (including knockout)	Total Draws (including knockout)	Total Losses (including knockout)	GF	GA	Best Finish
Battle Toads FC	6	30	10	3	9	24	27	Finals (3rd Edition)
LOAF'S LOAFS	6	27	10	3	9	45	36	Finals (4/6th Edition)
Swansea Denver AFC	5	28	10	1	6	41	34	Finals (5th Edition)
Saranac 1888s	4	12	4	0	9	24	38	Semifinals (3rd)
Toxic Rats	4	23	8	2	4	42	28	Finals (6th)
Amaral FC	2	8	3	2	3	12	15	Finals (1st Edition)
Lockport Jetz	2	13	6	1	2	23	15	Champions (5th Edition)
R.S.V. Hion	2	4	1	1	4	3	9	Group Stages (3rd)
Gaagii	1	7	3	1	1	16	18	Finals (2nd Edition)
Greater Poe FC	1	6	4	0	1	12	7	Champions (2nd Edition)
The Royal Bengals	1	6	2	0	2	8	5	Semifinals (2nd Edition)
Nida Miechow	1	3	1	0	2	4	8	Group Stages
Celtic Eagles FC	1	0	0	0	3	1	6	Group Stages
FC ETBU	1	7	2	1	0	8	6	Semifinals (Edition 1)
Spartan Curbstomp FC	1	5	3	2	0	20	8	Champions (Edition 1)
RC Indiana	1	0	0	0	3	4	10	Group Stages
Rio Grande Defenders FC	1	1	0	1	2	7	16	Group Stages
Middlesex Athletic	1	4	3	1	1	11	5	Champions (3rd)
S.I. Wildcats	1	3	1	0	2	9	11	Group Stages (3rd)
Uniao de Araras	1	6	4	0	1	17	9	Champions (4th)
Quad Amputees	1	3	1	0	2	2	4	Group Play (4th)
SCV Crave	1	1	0	1	2	5	12	Group Stages (5th)
SinaloaP4P	1	1	0	1	2	5	15	Group Stages (5th)
WATB	1	0	0	0	3	4	13	Group Stages (6th)
Cleveland Force	1	6	2	0	2	7	6	Semifinals (6th)

Points System

Teams will be awarded points for their participation in editions of the TBR. Every 10 seasons, The Willis Hong Perfect Human Being Award will be given to the team that has the highest total in such a period. The points system is as follows:

• 1 point for each edition played
• 2 points for a win
• -.5 for a loss
• .5 for a draw
• .1 for every goal scored
• -.1 for every goal against (from 5th edition on)
• 1 for qualification past group stages
• 3 for semifinal win
• 7 for championship

(Teams listed will only appear on rankings if they have played more than one season)

Team	Edition 1	Ed. 2	Ed. 3	Ed. 4	Ed. 5	Total
Swansea Denver AFC	8.9	0	3.7	8.5	8.2	29.3
Battle Toads FC	3.2	8.6	9.5	.6	5.1	27.0
LOAF'S LOAFS	2.1	-.2	4.1	8.9	4.6	19.5
Lockport Jetz	0	0	0	0	19.3	19.3
Toxic Rats	0	0	1.9	5.8	6.8	14.5
Amaral FC	7.4	3.5	0	0	0	10.9
Saranac 1888s	0	0	5.7	2.4	-.9	7.2
R.S.V. Hion	0	0	2.1	.6	0	2.7

The Zack Galifianakis Effort Award

For the teams who tried, but simply just didn't put fans in the seats (least amount of points accumulated in group play)

Sixth Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
WATB	0	-9	4

Fifth Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
Saranac 1888s	0	-4	5

Fourth Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
Battle Toads FC	1	-5	1

Third Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
Toxic Rats	2	-1	4

Second Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
LOAF'S LOAFS	0	-6	3

First Edition

Team	Points	Goal Differential	Goals For
RC Indiana	0	-6	4

Top Scorers By Edition

Edition 1

Player	Team	Goals
Jorge Raúl Miguel Marín	Spartan Curbstomp FC	5

Edition 2

Player	Team	Goals
Tom Richards	Greater Poe FC	6

Edition 3

Player	Team	Goals
Frederic Busquets	LOAF'S LOAFS	3
Edu Franqueza	Swansea Denver AFC	3
Henry Nesbitt	Swansea Denver AFC	3

Edition 4

Still in progress

Player	Team	Goals
Oscar Ballesta	Swansea Denver AFC	2

The Teddy Roosevelt Big Stick Award

Introduced for the first time in Edition 3, this award is given to the player that has accumulated the highest combination of Red and Yellow cards.

Red cards being worth 3 points, and Yellow cards being worth 1. There is also a 1 point bonus for scoring in the same match that you received a card, as well as 3 points awarded for instigating an injury.

Edition 3

Look at the extended results on the 3rd Edition page

Player	Team	Yellows	Reds	Bonus (Goal + Card in same game)	Caused Injury	Total Points
Coen Zeeuws	Saranac 1888s	0	1	1	0	4
Jacó do Vale	Toxic Rats	0	1	0	0	3

The Ronald Reagan Achievement Award

This award is given after each tournament to the oldest player to have scored a goal (and to have lived afterwards to tell about it).

• Note: A player must be at least 25 years of age at tournament's end to qualify.

Third Edition

Still in Progress***

Player	Team	Age at finish of tournament	Total Goals
Luís Alberto Valenca	R.S.V Hion	31.88	1
Lutomysl Nasierowski	BTFC	25.25	1

Second Edition

Player	Team	Age at finish of tournament	Total Goals
Pascual López	Gaagii	29.38	5

First Edition

Player	Team	Age at finish of Tournament	Total Goals
Jorge Raúl Miguel Marín	Spartan Curbstomp F.C.	33.67	5