Tight Butthole Republic Edition 7
 The first edition of the trophy, before it was eventually awarded to inaugural winners Spartan Curbstomp F.C. | |
| First Match | 3.11.2013 |
| Country |  USA
|
| Region | Pennsylvania |
| Zone | North America |
| Hosts | Battle Toads FC & LOAF'S LOAFS |
| Winner | TBD 3.18.2013 |
The Tight Butthole Republic is an American Tournament originating in Pennsylvania, more specifically in the suburban-Philadelphia area. The seventh edition of the tournament will start February 11th, 2013. The group stages finish January 25th, 2013, and the Final will be played March 18th, 2013.
The seventh edition marked the first time that 16 teams were used, rather than the traditional 8. This was due to co-host Battle Toads FC's high doses of medication as of late, and the aderol which made his confidence grow way too high.
The Teams
| Team | Appearances in TBR | Previous Best Finish |
|---|---|---|
| Battle Toads FC | 7 | Finals |
| LOAF'S LOAFS | 7 | Finals |
| Swansea Denver AFC | 6 | Finals |
| Toxic Rats | 5 | Champions |
| Saranac 1888s | 5 | Semifinals |
| Lockport Jetz | 3 | Champions |
| R.S.V. Hion | 3 | Group Stages |
| Middlesex United | 2 | Champions |
| FC Bogna | 1 | N/A |
| Queen City Psycho Squad | 1 | N/A |
| CUCCI | 1 | N/A |
| Schmikkel United | 1 | N/A |
| FC Partizan | 1 | N/A |
| First Shock Battalion | 1 | N/A |
| St Cuthbert Wanderers FC | 1 | N/A |
| The Terrible Team | 1 | N/A |
Groups
The TBR is split into 4 groups of 4 teams
Group A
| Nationality | Team | Wins | Draws | Losses | GF | GA | +/- | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
LOAF'S LOAFS | 3 | 0 | 0 | 7 | 2 | +5 | 9 |
|
|
Lockport Jetz | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 1 | +5 | 6 |
|
|
Toxic Rats | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 8 | -3 | 3 |
|
R.S.V. Hion | 0 | 0 | 3 | 2 | 9 | -7 | 0 |
Group B
| Nationality | Team | Wins | Draws | Losses | GF | GA | +/- | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
FC Bogna | 2 | 0 | 1 | 10 | 2 | +8 | 6 |
|
|
Queen City Psycho Squad | 2 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 4 | +1 | 6 |
|
|
CUCCI | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 4 | -2 | 3 |
|
|
Swansea Denver AFC | 1 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 9 | -7 | 3 |
Group C
| Nationality | Team | Wins | Draws | Losses | GF | GA | +/- | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
FC Partizan | 2 | 0 | 1 | 7 | 3 | +4 | 6 |
|
|
Middlesex Athletic | 2 | 0 | 1 | 6 | 2 | +4 | 6 |
|
|
Schmikkel United | 2 | 0 | 1 | 4 | 2 | +2 | 6 |
|
|
First Shock Battalion | 0 | 0 | 3 | 0 | 10 | -10 | 0 |
Group D
| Nationality | Team | Wins | Draws | Losses | GF | GA | +/- | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
St Cuthbert Wanderers FC | 2 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 4 | +7 | 7 |
|
The Terrible Team | 2 | 1 | 0 | 11 | 6 | +5 | 7 |
|
|
Saranac 1888s | 1 | 0 | 2 | 5 | 10 | -5 | 3 |
|
|
Battle Toads FC | 0 | 0 | 3 | 3 | 10 | -7 | 0 |
Quarterfinals
3.4.13 LOAF'S LOAFS 2 - 1 Queen City Psycho Squad FC Partizan 3(6) - 3(7) The Terrible Team
St Cuthbert Wanderers 3 - 0 Lockport Jetz FC Bogna 3 - 1 Middlesex Athletic
Semifinals
3.11.13 LOAF'S LOAFS 3 - 1 The Terrible Team
FC Bogna 5 - 2 St Cuthbert Wanderers
Championship
3.18.13 LOAF'S LOAFS 4 - 3 FC Bogna
Goal Scorers
| Player | Team | Goals |
|---|---|---|
| Jacò do Vale | Toxic Rats | 0 |
| Tom Harvey | Toxic Rats | 0 |
The Zack Galifianakis Effort Award
For the teams who tried, but simply just didn't put fans in the seats (least amount of points accumulated in group play)
Edition 6
| Team | Points | Goal Differential | Goals For |
|---|---|---|---|
| WATB | 0 | -9 | 4 |
The Ronald Reagan Achievement Award
This award is given after each tournament to the oldest player to have scored a goal (and to have lived afterwards to tell about it).
- Note: A player must be at least 25 years of age at tournament's end to qualify.
Edition 6
| Player | Team | Age at finish of tournament | Total Goals |
|---|---|---|---|
| Guido Alvisi | LOAF'S LOAFS | 22.97 | 0 |
