LOAF'S LOAFS Season 50
The LOAF'S LOAFS Unofficial Logo, featuring its slogan "LONG LIVE THE LOAF," also known simply as "LLTL"
|Rival||Battle Toads FC|
|Fan club||The Yeast Army (2144 Fans as of 5/10/12)|
|Home Match Kits|
|Home Match Kits|
|Current Coach||Terencjusz "Terrence" Myszko (Since 11-2-11)|
This is the page for Season 50 of USA club LOAF'S LOAFS, which started on October 4th, 2012 with the first round of US Open Cup matches. The team started the season in 3rd place in V.54 (USA), as it had finished there the season before.
|Season||League||US Open Cup||Trophies||Top goalscorer||Goals|
|50||1st place in V.54||4th Round||Tiziano Caneva||9|
The season commenced as LOAF'S traveled to Gotham in Indiana to battle robot TheDarkKnight. The match was a joke, but fortunately Indiana is known for its strip clubs, and the team had a nice bonding session a few hours before the match. With a 5-5-0 formation, the team easily plowed through the bot for a 10-0 win and a nice clean sheet for keeper Russ Fontaine.
|FC Deich||Series||The Bakery||7-0 LL||1-0 3 pts||Lessmeister (3), Balsiger (2), Wilks, Hansen|
The first game of the season followed just a few days after the LL robot domination. It was also the home opener of The Bakery, which had undergone a 10,000 seat-adding renovation on Oct. 3 to bring the total to 39,200. The Yeast Army showed up in full force, filling out 99.1% attendance and creating an intimidating atmosphere for visiting rivals FC Deich, which had a dominant career 3-1 record against LL in the previous 2 seasons. Due to incredible hazing of the visitor's bus on their trip from the local La Quinta in to The Bakery, which included empty beer bottles shattering bus windows, and the equipment manager physically removed from the bus in order to be tarred and feathered, Deich's confidence was clearly rattled. This could have been a reason the team sent out just 9 players to open the match, and due to multiple injuries finished with just 8 on the pitch. LOAF'S, being up at least 2 men the entire match, won by a managable 7-0 as German Emmerich "Blitzkreig" Lessteiner scored his first career hattrick. October 4th to October 11th will hereby be known as Robonukah, given LL's pure determination to get things done against less-than-able opponents.
|Rover Tech FC||Cup||Defender Arena||4-2 LL||Adv. to 3rd rd||Lessmeister (2), Busquets, Urner|
The second round is generally a pretty tight butthole of a matchup. LL had no choice but to throw out their B squad for this one, and boy didn't they play like reserves.
LL entered their next series game at the top of the league, confidence was riding a little too high, and so was the forecast for rain at the strip club. Just hours before kickoff, new acquisition Lloyd Wiggins was spotted at Providence, RI strip club Balloons throwing around, coincidentally, the exact amount that he had made 2 weeks earlier as a signing bonus. In retrospect, LL regrets having paid him in dollar bills. The team went on to have an extremely disappointing 0-0 draw despite being heavily favorited. News arose just days later that the team threatened mutiny if Coach Myszko didn't "Play it Cool."
Just three days later, an mentally exhausted LOAF'S took action once again at The Bakery, this time against Series IV Hawaians FC Kazimierz. The team was brutally dominated, 0-4, in front of a sold out home crowd. Needless to say, the crowd was not too happy. Unfortunately for the administration, that day was the promotional "Retro Glass Bottle Night," which certainly did not help Guido Alvisi's recovery with his broken neck.
|Gate 13||Series||Green Hell Arena||0-0||2-0-2||No goals|
Perhaps the biggest match of the season to date was against Series V.54 rival Gate 13, a team which LL had dominated last year, taking all 6 points in their two meetings. The team came out fresh, reaching Titanic in central defense, but was unable to muster enough attack to score on an 11 year old's youth team, hence a rather predictable 0-0 draw. Series competitor FC Deich managed a win, and in doing so jumped LOAF'S, removing them from their season-long 1st place position.
|TheDarkKnight, VI.305||10/4/12||Cup||Gotham||9840 (12000) 82%||10-0 LL||Guido Alvisi, Mikey Balsiger, Edgar Engelen (2), Darryl Wilks, Frederic Busquets, Jason Fortier (2), Cary Dobson|
|FC Deich||10/8/12||Series||The Bakery||38,848 (39,200) 99.1%||7-0 LL||Emmerich Lessmeister (3), Darryl Wilks, Mikey Balsiger (2), Peer Hansen|
|Rover Tech FC, VI.853||10/11/12||Cup||Defender Arena||16,985 (100%)||4-2 LL||Emmerich Lessmeister (2), Frederic Busquets, Ryan Urner|
|PoonOnYou||10/15/12||Series||Forever||27,055 (100%)||1-0 LL||Darryl Wilks|
|Tampa Bay Raiders||10/18/12||Cup||The Bakery||38,278 (97.6%)||2-0 LL||Frederic Busquets, Cary Dobson|
|Spring Arbor FC||10/22/12||Series||The Bakery||38,044 (97.5%)||0-0|
|FC Kazimierz||10/25/12||Cup||The Bakery||38,407 (98.0%)||0-4|
|Gate 13||10/29/12||Series||Green Hall Arena||19,117 (34,350 (55.7%)||0-0|
|Penn State FC||11/5/12||Series||The Bakery||24,053 (39,200 (61.4%))||5-0||Lessmeister (2), Tiziano Caneva (3)|
|Gordo's Gods||11/12/12||Series||Gordos Dome||19,710||1-1||Guido Alvisi|
|San Marcos Revolutionaries||11/19/12||Series||Anarchist Arena||26,910||7-0||Tiziano Caneva, Emmerich Lessmeister, Darryl Wilks, Frederic Busquets, Guido Alvisi, Tristan Elroy, Cary Dobson|
|San Marcos Revolutionaries||11/26/12||Series||The Bakery||38,620||8-0||Edgar Engelen, Mikey Balsiger (3), Tiziano Caneva (2), Tristan Elroy, Cary Dobson|
|Gordo's Gods||12/3/12||Series||The Bakery||39,129||1-0||Tiziano Caneva|
|1||GK||Russ Werewolf Fontaine||17||0||13||0||4||0|
- Golden Loaf: Tiziano Caneva, 8 times man of the match.
- LVP: Darryl Wilks, 7 time disappointment
- Top Scorer: Tiziano Caneva, 9 goals (9+0)
- Top Defender: Russ Werewolf Fontaine, 13 clean sheets
Team of the Week
Every week, series V.54 commissioner Matt Damon announces the top XI of the previous week. Here are some LL honors
Winger: Week 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14
Winger: Week 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 10
Wingback: Week 1
Central Defender: Week 10
Inner Midfielder: Week 11, 13
Inner Midfielder: Week 10, 14
LL plays it's 4th season in Series V.54 (USA). It finished 47, 48, and 49 in 4th, 3rd, and 3rd, respectively.
|3.||Spring Arbor FC||9||5||2||2||13||6||+7||17|
|6.||San Marcos Revolutionaries||9||3||0||6||11||32||-21||9|
|8.||Penn State FC||9||0||0||9||3||38||-35||0|
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|Season 49<<||Season 50||>>Season 51|